You Melt My Heart To Stone

Am I truly so unloveable, that even my own sister, my own flesh and blood, cannot even embrace me without being repulsed? I know I'm not disgusting, or too hideous, but can no one find it in themselves to see me for the wonderful being that i just might be? I know i have a long ways to go before i become fantastic, or really before i even regain my usual charm, but i'm really feeling just how lonely and alone i am in this big world. Not a single guy has actually asked me on a single date in almost six months, nor have i seen family or had anyone hug me and tell me they love me in the same amount of time. and i dont just mean boyfriends. i mean, like, family, best friends, etc. and here i am, still completely by myself, not even able to express these fears of mine to a physical being. ranting online has literally become my only expression of emotions. Even my younger sister is getting dates!! (not saying that she shouldnt, but i was always more social than she is). I feel like i'm fading into the background. like i've lost everything special about me; everything that made me stand out as a person, and i'm becoming the support of all others. I mean, I love being there for everyone around me, and i'm quite good at it, but sometimes i miss the way i used to shine. *sigh* i just dont know whats wrong with me.